The mere fact that you didn't run for the hills screaming or didn't react in a very negative way to him telling you all that crap about his drama and his exes I would say lets him know you're willing to stick it out and wait for him if he ever decides to exercise the option on you. Now I'm not knocking honesty and coming clean, there are points to be gained for that. But if he really wanted to date you, he wouldn't have busted out with the whole drama bit. Worse yet, he tells you about going out KNOWING you can't. That's either real dumb, or just totally insensitive. He might as well breakdance in front of you.
And having him do penance for all this is perhaps the worst way to start a relationship I've ever heard of. Now I could be wrong, this guy might be alright. But I'm thinking you should pay attention to any of the other potentials and let this guy make the effort to come to you. Anyway, best of luck :)
24 October 2004
Yeah, she's definitely back :)
Just remember, Susan--whatever doesn't kill you, makes you stronger. Sorry to hear about the accident and the latest entries in your love life. I've noticed in many a blog that people finally realize just how "out there" this web log thingy is. People, you have to understand that in the age of the Internet, we've finally been able to measure how quickly information can spread. You tell just one person about this site, and odds are you'll have hundreds of people looking at it in a week. Not to mention those that just click "Next Blog" at the top and happen on it. I kept a diary on my PC a la Doogie Howser for a year and a half, and NO ONE has EVER seen it. And they never will. But on here, you have to be ready for people to comment on your life, and not all of the comments will be nice. So don't put anything out here you don't want known. So now you know... and knowing is half the battle...
G.I. JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOE!!!!!
Man, that NEVER gets old.
So, about this Chris fellow: He's either A) not interested or B) really, REALLY dumb, and possibly both. Once you know more about a man's drama and his sexual past than you do him, you're reached the Friend (with possibility of Benefits) Zone, or the Plan B Zone. And from the way you tell it, you've given him the message that you indeed will be there waiting for him once Plan A goes bad. It's a dangerous game you're playing, much like the one that involves casual sex. You have to be pretty mentally tough to continue on in a situation like that without it bothering you eventually, and although you seemed to have grown a bit in the past couple months, I doubt you're really ready to engage in such a game. So move on to the next contestants. Let him make up his mind what is more important to him while you pursue others that may be more willing to put you first.
Speaking of online dating, I finally found a decent one. Imagine that, a girl that actually came AS ADVERTISED, looks-wise, age-wise, everything-wise. Almost rekindled my faith in the whole thing. Screw the stigma, everyone does it nowadays, so don't even sweat it.
Anyway, welcome back.
Did anyone catch the lesser Simpson sister blowing it on SNL? That was classic :) Someone please send the siblings to the Sidekick Shack... Ashlee, Haylie, whatever Britney's sister's name is... I'm done with it.
Just remember, Susan--whatever doesn't kill you, makes you stronger. Sorry to hear about the accident and the latest entries in your love life. I've noticed in many a blog that people finally realize just how "out there" this web log thingy is. People, you have to understand that in the age of the Internet, we've finally been able to measure how quickly information can spread. You tell just one person about this site, and odds are you'll have hundreds of people looking at it in a week. Not to mention those that just click "Next Blog" at the top and happen on it. I kept a diary on my PC a la Doogie Howser for a year and a half, and NO ONE has EVER seen it. And they never will. But on here, you have to be ready for people to comment on your life, and not all of the comments will be nice. So don't put anything out here you don't want known. So now you know... and knowing is half the battle...
G.I. JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOE!!!!!
Man, that NEVER gets old.
So, about this Chris fellow: He's either A) not interested or B) really, REALLY dumb, and possibly both. Once you know more about a man's drama and his sexual past than you do him, you're reached the Friend (with possibility of Benefits) Zone, or the Plan B Zone. And from the way you tell it, you've given him the message that you indeed will be there waiting for him once Plan A goes bad. It's a dangerous game you're playing, much like the one that involves casual sex. You have to be pretty mentally tough to continue on in a situation like that without it bothering you eventually, and although you seemed to have grown a bit in the past couple months, I doubt you're really ready to engage in such a game. So move on to the next contestants. Let him make up his mind what is more important to him while you pursue others that may be more willing to put you first.
Speaking of online dating, I finally found a decent one. Imagine that, a girl that actually came AS ADVERTISED, looks-wise, age-wise, everything-wise. Almost rekindled my faith in the whole thing. Screw the stigma, everyone does it nowadays, so don't even sweat it.
Anyway, welcome back.
Did anyone catch the lesser Simpson sister blowing it on SNL? That was classic :) Someone please send the siblings to the Sidekick Shack... Ashlee, Haylie, whatever Britney's sister's name is... I'm done with it.
22 October 2004
She said:
What I did last night:
~went to movie night. Saw The Corporation. Resolved never to shop again, realizing I'd break that resolve almost immediately.
~straightened up my house (stacked the papers on the table and moved the pile to desk)
~made dinner -- if you call making refried bean dip "Making Dinner." It's definitely cooking with a lower case "c."
~ate dinner watching ER. Generally a bad idea, but not so bad last night.
~vacuumed (have company coming, HAD to be done. I've been putting it off for 2 weeks)
~watched the rest of a taped episode of Gilmore Girls (I watched about half last night)
~watched One Tree Hill -- I have got to get better taste in television.
~got ready for bed and cleaned the bathroom
~read 2.5 chapters in Kafka's The Castle
~slept
So I guess I did a little of both -- should and want.
But this is the problem -- I know that IF I schedule things, I will do them. I just can't seem to schedule them. I did 2 years of TKD in grad school, as PE classes. Loved it. I've never done it in a studio, though. Scary. Okay, that's an excuse, too. I'll think about it this weekend. Let you know what I come up with.
What I did last night:
~went to movie night. Saw The Corporation. Resolved never to shop again, realizing I'd break that resolve almost immediately.
~straightened up my house (stacked the papers on the table and moved the pile to desk)
~made dinner -- if you call making refried bean dip "Making Dinner." It's definitely cooking with a lower case "c."
~ate dinner watching ER. Generally a bad idea, but not so bad last night.
~vacuumed (have company coming, HAD to be done. I've been putting it off for 2 weeks)
~watched the rest of a taped episode of Gilmore Girls (I watched about half last night)
~watched One Tree Hill -- I have got to get better taste in television.
~got ready for bed and cleaned the bathroom
~read 2.5 chapters in Kafka's The Castle
~slept
So I guess I did a little of both -- should and want.
But this is the problem -- I know that IF I schedule things, I will do them. I just can't seem to schedule them. I did 2 years of TKD in grad school, as PE classes. Loved it. I've never done it in a studio, though. Scary. Okay, that's an excuse, too. I'll think about it this weekend. Let you know what I come up with.
21 October 2004
You're afraid of commitment?
What to do, what to do with your free time... I like the choice of topic.
He said:
Where's the fun in doing what you SHOULD be doing? When has that ever gotten anyone anywhere? This is what I did tonight:
-- watched Angel rerun on TNT
-- watched two episodes of The Simpsons
-- chatted with someone on MSN, then Yahoo Messenger
-- drove to Popeyes (Love That Chicken!) and got dinner
-- watched the NLCS Game 7
-- chatted up Becca, former roommate of Beth, former girlfriend of Bill, on AOL IM, and caught up for a bit
-- talked to a friend on the phone
The list of what I COULD have been doing is far too long to even attempt to put down.
I've found that the hardest part of getting constructive things done is getting them started in the first place. Once you can get past that, the rest is relatively easy. That obviously has been difficult for me when it comes to doing things around the house, as evidenced by the ceiling fan that still lies on my office floor, where it has been for the last two and a half years. I forced myself into a routine with the laundry, so that hasn't been too bad. In general, I try to make as little of a mess as possible in order to avoid having to clean up as often.
I guess it really all comes down to priorities. But man, you sound like me in that last post in terms of indecisiveness. Perhaps you could turn some of the emphasis you place on some of your opinions into direction for your free time. Take an interest in your own life like you do politics. All mental and no physical is no good. You'll end up a fat, lazy, bloated brain incapable of leaving the couch. I like the Tae Kwon Do idea--I took it for a year when I was 10, have the green belt to prove it. Besides, everyone likes learning how to kick ass. But why stop there? Why not learn something exotic like Muay Thai kickboxing? Maybe they should add that to the Small Steps website.
Anyway, the key is to get some things scheduled and do them a couple times. I know I have flag football on Wednesdays, and tennis on Thursdays. Some of my co-workers go biking on Tuesdays and Saturdays. Once you get into a routine, these things are a lot easier.
I totally understand the sentiment behind "recovering"; however, it's merely an excuse to procrastinate. My Dad likes to remind me that I told him I'd take maybe one or two years off from overachieving after graduating from GT. That was five years ago ;)
What to do, what to do with your free time... I like the choice of topic.
He said:
Where's the fun in doing what you SHOULD be doing? When has that ever gotten anyone anywhere? This is what I did tonight:
-- watched Angel rerun on TNT
-- watched two episodes of The Simpsons
-- chatted with someone on MSN, then Yahoo Messenger
-- drove to Popeyes (Love That Chicken!) and got dinner
-- watched the NLCS Game 7
-- chatted up Becca, former roommate of Beth, former girlfriend of Bill, on AOL IM, and caught up for a bit
-- talked to a friend on the phone
The list of what I COULD have been doing is far too long to even attempt to put down.
I've found that the hardest part of getting constructive things done is getting them started in the first place. Once you can get past that, the rest is relatively easy. That obviously has been difficult for me when it comes to doing things around the house, as evidenced by the ceiling fan that still lies on my office floor, where it has been for the last two and a half years. I forced myself into a routine with the laundry, so that hasn't been too bad. In general, I try to make as little of a mess as possible in order to avoid having to clean up as often.
I guess it really all comes down to priorities. But man, you sound like me in that last post in terms of indecisiveness. Perhaps you could turn some of the emphasis you place on some of your opinions into direction for your free time. Take an interest in your own life like you do politics. All mental and no physical is no good. You'll end up a fat, lazy, bloated brain incapable of leaving the couch. I like the Tae Kwon Do idea--I took it for a year when I was 10, have the green belt to prove it. Besides, everyone likes learning how to kick ass. But why stop there? Why not learn something exotic like Muay Thai kickboxing? Maybe they should add that to the Small Steps website.
Anyway, the key is to get some things scheduled and do them a couple times. I know I have flag football on Wednesdays, and tennis on Thursdays. Some of my co-workers go biking on Tuesdays and Saturdays. Once you get into a routine, these things are a lot easier.
I totally understand the sentiment behind "recovering"; however, it's merely an excuse to procrastinate. My Dad likes to remind me that I told him I'd take maybe one or two years off from overachieving after graduating from GT. That was five years ago ;)
Well, I'm all for change, all the time. I've had 8 addresses in the last 10 years. What does that tell you?
Hmmm. My brain feels a little dead. I can't think of any good issue to discuss right now. Okay, not really an issue, but how's this:
SHE SAID:
Free time. What do you do with it? I'm now two years out from finishing my thesis. Two years. For four years, I was in college, lived in a dorm, and between classes, work, and theatre, I didn't have a ton of free time. What I did have was spent bullshitting with friends in the dorm and out. For three years after that, I was in grad school, again working, and hanging out with likeminded folk. Mostly, for fun, we ate. Gotta eat, may as well do it with friends. In grad school, there was always school work you could be doing -- more things to read and know. It was like studying, or feeling guilty because you weren't, 24/7.
So now, I work 8 hours a day, have a part-time job in academia, take a class one night a week (this month), belong to a film club that watches a movie one night a week, and have time I don't know what to do with. I could keep my apartment clean. I could be more proactive about finding a house (how can you be proactive if no one's selling anything good?), could do laundry before I was absolutely out of underwear, could work on my craft projects, could unpack those boxes I moved into the back bedroom's closet a year and a half ago, could read more. But I don't. I don't know what I do. I'm keeping up on what's new in the television world, that's for sure. I occasionally surf.
I guess my question is this: what SHOULD I be doing that I'm not? How do I get it together? I know one thing -- I should be doing something, anything, physical. I should take up Tae Kwon Do again. I'm too much of a lazy couch potato. My grad school roommate used to joke that you had to trick me into exercising -- she's right. I will walk, IF I have somewhere to go. Otherwise, I don't. We used to "play" racquetball -- very, very, very badly. It was fun, more of a workout for all the laughing.
I keep thinking I should be more scheduled, where things get done regularly, I cook more, my place is reasonably clean, and I DO something. But so far, I'm failing. I told myself for a while that I was "recovering" from grad school and then that I was "recovering" from the learning curve at work. Bs. How pathetic!
Okay, got to go finish something before I go home. Big day tomorrow.
Hmmm. My brain feels a little dead. I can't think of any good issue to discuss right now. Okay, not really an issue, but how's this:
SHE SAID:
Free time. What do you do with it? I'm now two years out from finishing my thesis. Two years. For four years, I was in college, lived in a dorm, and between classes, work, and theatre, I didn't have a ton of free time. What I did have was spent bullshitting with friends in the dorm and out. For three years after that, I was in grad school, again working, and hanging out with likeminded folk. Mostly, for fun, we ate. Gotta eat, may as well do it with friends. In grad school, there was always school work you could be doing -- more things to read and know. It was like studying, or feeling guilty because you weren't, 24/7.
So now, I work 8 hours a day, have a part-time job in academia, take a class one night a week (this month), belong to a film club that watches a movie one night a week, and have time I don't know what to do with. I could keep my apartment clean. I could be more proactive about finding a house (how can you be proactive if no one's selling anything good?), could do laundry before I was absolutely out of underwear, could work on my craft projects, could unpack those boxes I moved into the back bedroom's closet a year and a half ago, could read more. But I don't. I don't know what I do. I'm keeping up on what's new in the television world, that's for sure. I occasionally surf.
I guess my question is this: what SHOULD I be doing that I'm not? How do I get it together? I know one thing -- I should be doing something, anything, physical. I should take up Tae Kwon Do again. I'm too much of a lazy couch potato. My grad school roommate used to joke that you had to trick me into exercising -- she's right. I will walk, IF I have somewhere to go. Otherwise, I don't. We used to "play" racquetball -- very, very, very badly. It was fun, more of a workout for all the laughing.
I keep thinking I should be more scheduled, where things get done regularly, I cook more, my place is reasonably clean, and I DO something. But so far, I'm failing. I told myself for a while that I was "recovering" from grad school and then that I was "recovering" from the learning curve at work. Bs. How pathetic!
Okay, got to go finish something before I go home. Big day tomorrow.