You leave my "Love" alone. She looked pretty damn pathetic on Punk'd... they were offering her a fake movie role, and she seemed pretty desperate to find work... sad, really. She's still cute, though. That's all qualification she needs to work for me :) Add to this case Leslee Sobieski, the chick from "Joy Ride". I looked her up on IMDB, and she ain't done sh*t lately. I'm just thinking it must suck to live in our celebrity one day/forgotten the next society. That's right, I said I actually feel sorry for some ex-celebs... Welcome to the age of Hilary Duff/Lindsay Lohan. I don't remember girls dressing that way in high school when *I* was there...

I'm thinking I'm not going to have much time in NY to sight-see, which sucks, but I'm glad to just be going to see if I do want to return and do it right later, which I'm sure I will.

When I came to the blog page today, I think I got the April 17 entry. It's not just you. It's the MAAAAAAAAAAAGIC of the Internet.

Sometimes I think it's sad that I play a larger part in the lives of my friends' children than I do my own nieces and nephews. Of course, the large part of that is due to proximity, me being here in Tampa, and my family being in Orlando. My take on the whole friends/family situation is that a biological connection is nice and all, but why should you not treat people who aren't related to you as if they were? It's kinda the way I see birthdays/holidays. In a perfect world, everyone would treat you like it was your birthday or Christmas EVERY DAY. Of course, it's this same sort of thinking that has cost me a couple of relationships :)

Well, I'll be off to my IRA training tomorrow, mates--wish me luck ;)

I'll pour out a pint for all of ye. Cheers!

Countdown to Ireland: ONE
Countdown to NY: 11

Can someone explain to me why navigating directly to www.wickedmoxie.blogspot.com is giving me weird, outdated versions of the blog? When I did it from home, I got the old girly one from February! Granted, my computer is currently home to a nice virus or worm which I need to take care of, but still, what's up?

Everyone has family, and you like them more or less depending on your relations. Most people also have friends, and if you don't like them, you probably lose them. We sometimes say our friends are like the family we choose. If we were legally or biologically bound to friends, would they become more like family, where you didn't like them as much? Commonlaw friendship??

Dude, "love" embarrassed herself attempting a music career. Looks like people have not yet forgiven her for that. Also, she made the mistake of making a whole shitload of teen flicks in her early 20s. Bad movie, to typecast yourself as the unattainable high school girl right when you should be attempting adulthood.

I would love to go to NYC. If I could get work to pay for it, that would be even better. I want to go and do it right, not desperately search for the least roach-infested project with an affordable room. For me, the countdown is 11 days to Yankton, SD. Woo-hoo!

Anyway, what is it about Monday? We could have cancelled work today just for lack of interest, society-wide. Yug.

Well, the whole point of being a sports fan is that sometimes your team is going to win, sometimes they are going to lose, but you will always (yeah, right) support them--it's all part of the experience. In my case as a new bandwagon fan...

LIGHTNING WIN LIGHTNING WIN LIGHTNING WIN

So now I have a whole new chance to be disappointed. But what if... what if Tampa Bay wins the Stanley Cup, not even two years removed from winning the Superbowl and the Arena Bowl? Tampa was the capital of football in 2002-2003. It could become the capital of (get this) HOCKEY in 2004. Sports--you gotta love it--the thrill of victory, the agony of defeat!

I'll grant you the Colonel is a white icon like no other, but the spinach-eatin', Bluto-beatin', Olive Oyl-savin' (God knows why he bothers), anchor tattoo-sportin', pipe-smokin', eye-squintin', O.G. one-man-wreckin' crew known as Popeye the Sailor Man ain't no slouch. Only difference there is Popeye perpetrates White-on-White crime. Maybe he should be the ghetto icon... I'M KIDDING I'M KIDDING :) Sadly enough, Church's has no icon to call its own, although the thought of a drumstick-wielding bishop is somewhat amusing.

In other news, I'm off to the Big Apple for the first time ever (besides a two hour stint in JFK on my way to Tokyo) for a couple weeks to take a class for work. Having scratched that one off the list finally, I can turn my attention to California as the one major locale in the US I have never set foot in.

Random thought: Why can't Jennifer Love Hewitt find work? How does she end up on an episode of Punk'd, desperate to find an acting role? There's always a place for her in my organization...

Countdown to Ireland: 3
Countdown to NY: 13

Yep, you're a cave. A black hole sponge, if you will (I prefer that to black hole sun -- it makes more sense and makes the song funnier.) Let it out!

Um, we're so white up here that no only can I blind someone with just a cropped shirt (argh! the bright light!) but we don't have Popeye's or Church's. We've tons of Chinese-American buffets (they never actually include American in the name) and lots of hamburger joints, but no chicken other than KFC. The Honorable and Venerable Colonel is an icon of white colonization. Our Big Boy turns 50 this year, though. Another creepy mascot there.

See? Sports fans are just gluttons for disappointment. Even if your team wins one year, they likely won't repeat it! Dumbfuckery on so many levels.

I love Friday. Even if your personal Friday (filed before your personal jesus) isn't on actual Friday, it's all good. It's Friday!

Okay, I have a meeting to go prepare for. Peace out. Ghetto chicken makes the world a happier place.

STOOPID F@#*(&ING LIGHTNING

Yeah, that's right--I said ghetto chicken. There's a common theory that you will never find Church's or Popeye's in a nice (typically white) neighborhood. Moreover, you will only find Church's in the worst ghetto parts of town. This second part appears to be mostly true. But if you've ever seen either one in a nice part of town, let me know. I believe I've seen Popeye's in decent neighborhoods. Why do I ask? I want one in the nice quiet white neighborhood I live in now. I know they'd make a killing cuz all we have is KFC right now. Not to mention four Publii (what IS the plural of Publix, anyway?) with three matching Blockbusters, and three McDonalds. But my friends keep telling me Popeye's is too ghetto for my neighborhood.

I thought 42 was the answer to everything. Maybe the answer is 42 Morrisseys.

Good luck with that spontaneous combustion performance. I'm thinking you might want to put in a call to Industrial Light and Magic.

Friday has arrived.

I always figured you two for Springer eventually anyway. Maybe Maury. Most likely Judge Judy ;)

The dark depths of a cave? Is that what I am, some sort of cave? Some sort of dark region that's SLOWLY CONSUMING ALL OF WHAT I AM??? DO YOU THINK I *NEED* SUNLIGHT?!? I WILL DESTROY ALL OF YOU!!!

Man, you're right. I do feel better :)

Yo. Que pasa?

Ghetto chicken?

Morrissey is the answer to everything. I, too, have forgiven Jesus. I have not yet forgiven His Church. Or the Pope. Bastards, all of them. Isn't buggery a form of birth control? Especially when it's man on man?

Spring! I love it!
Laundry. Hate it. But one must needs have clean underwear. And clean jeans. And clean towels. Okay, the last is the most important. You can go without underwear, wear dirty jeans or find other pants, but dirty towels are unsurmountable. Especially when having company.

There's a thespian game -- sudden death. It's improv, and when or if you screw up enough that the "audience" notices, they scream "Die!" and you must act your death. I always wanted to do spontaneous combustion and couldn't figure out how to do that -- it always looked like I was blowing myself up. But that's how I'd like the world to go -- in a pop, meaningless and not sparkly at all. Just disappearing.

Friday needs to hurry itself along a little faster.

Oh, can we discuss Susan's need to share "Mandy" with me? If you've got a thing for Barry, that's fine, but it shouldn't be aired like dirty laundry in public. Next thing I know, I'm going to be on Jerry Springer and Susan will be telling me she's been screwing my brother for years. Not that I'd care that much, but for all past foibles, I did think she had better taste than that (Barry and my brother).

Writing, even when it makes no sense, is good for the soul. It's like letting a little sunlight reach the dark depths of a cave.

Off to home and the laundromat.

Spring rocks.

Why is Popeye's chicken too ghetto for white neighborhoods? It's clearly a step above Church's, and it's WAY better than Kitchen Fried Crap.

All addiction is the same.

Current slogan that defines most people in general: "It's never enough".

Carpe Canis.

Don't sweat the small stuff.

Remember to find beauty in all that you see and do today!

Take advantage of my non-sensical ramblings while you can...

Countdown to Ireland: 7

LET'S GO LIGHTNING!!!

Ah. Clearly, the answer to my question is:

I) Morrissey

:)

ah yes, moz is back baby in a big way! this new album, You are the Quarry, is old school moz at its best! snappy lyrics and good musical backing, oh yeah! heres just a sample to whet your music appetite.....


"jesus hurted/ when he deserted me, but/ i have forgiven jesus/ for all the love/ he placed in me/ when theres no one i can turn to with this love/ monday-humiliation/ tuesday-suffocation/ wednesday-condescension/ thursday-is just pathetic/ by friday-life has killed me..."

-I Have Forgiven Jesus


"she told me she loved me/which means/she must be insane..."

-How Can Anybody Possibly Know How I Feel?


"america/land of the free, they said/and of opportunity/in a just and truthful way but where the president is never black, female, or gay and until that day youve got nothing to say to me to help me believe/in america..."

-America is Not The World


"this world is full/so full of crashing bores and i must be one cos no one ever turns to me to say "take me in your arms take me in your arms/ and love me and love me..."

-The World is Full of Crashing Bores



oh yeah, fire up your music downloader of choice and start downloading! or you can actually go to the store and buy it yourself. funny enough, itunes is selling it online for cheaper than the store so download it legally from there if you must be honest...lol! i bought myself a legal copy of course because MOZ IS GOD!!! plus the pic of him wearing a pinstriped suit holding a tommy gun is FABULOUS!!! go forth and listen!

So in honor of the upcoming "East Coast gets wiped out" movie, The Day After Tomorrow, I present the following:

I was watching this show in Discovery HD (I've found I'll watch pretty much ANYTHING in High Definition) about the Arctic melting and scientists seem to think we've got until 2050 before something really bad happens (a la The Day After Tomorrow). So start saying your goodbyes now :)

Which of the following disaster movies do you think will REALLY bring about The End of the World(tm):

A) The Day After Tomorrow
B) Armageddon/Deep Impact
C) Mars Attacks! (my personal favorite)
D) Dawn of the Dead
E) The Core
F) 10.5
G) The Day After
H) The Terminator series 2 3

Cast your vote now, before we all die horrible deaths ;)

Now she clarifies. I was having fun for a second there.

Just so I understand, you need real people and stories that may be real or fiction? Can I give you real fictional people with ficitious real stories? You might want to clarify a bit, but I'm glad to help. So far I've got no cartoons, no news, no game shows. That pretty much leaves us with sitcoms and dramas. Is that more of what you're looking for?

Next time I'm at the beach, I'll think of you ;)

Food is good. While up in ATL, my friends took me to one of those Brazilian Steakhouses. Let's call it Heaven for Carnivores. And you have to love mixes like the one you had, that Midwestern Mexican.

You got it, we're going straight across the country. Our tour has us already booked in hotels and such, I'm just looking for suggestions of places to hit in the cities.

Yeah, being "in" changes things. I like the idea of sharing travel with someone, though. I felt like shit on Monday when we got to the ATL airport, and the SO dealt well with it. Susan can tell you how pleasant I am when I don't sleep. But it was nice to have someone to chat with occasionally.

Um, can we try again with the raw data? I need real people (cartoons aren't going to be helpful) and stories -- either fiction or reality, but not game shows or news programs (not that I saw the latter on your list, but I may have missed them). And anything that is not either on TV now, in syndication, or on DVD, that you also don't have a tape or two of, isn't going to be helpful. From your raw data, I must actually find and watch at least a few episodes of the show.

Beach? Even if we had one, I think it's about 45 degrees out!

Had Midwestern Mexican for lunch. Tater tostadas. They put beans, seasoned chicken, cheese, lettuce, tomatoes, sour cream and guacamole on potato skins. I like food.

As for Ireland, we went north out of Dublin up towards Sligo, and then down the western side of the country. I gather you're going more or less across? I would look into B&Bs for places to stay. My mom and I did. They're between $20 and $55 a night, cheaper than the hotels, and generally include a breakfast bigger than you could eat. Although some may have weird hours, so check first.

:)

You know it's a bright, sunny day down here too. A lot of people are at Clearwater Beach. Wish I was one of them.

Hey, if you got any other good places to go in Dublin/Galway/Shannon, send 'em along... I want all the suggestions I can get. I'm probably going to have to return to really check the country out, same problem with England. Haven't even been to Scotland yet. Ugh--not enough time, dammit. I need about three lifetimes at the rate I'm going.

I never said I wasn't going to travel with my SO (assuming I ever have one again). You're absolutely right, it would be beneficial to me if she enjoys travel, because I can be kinda hard to keep in one place. But you don't have to be at the point to where you have kids for travel to be difficult. I'm just saying that for now, I don't have to worry about mutual scheduling or compromising more than just among friends. I can pretty much just get up and go. A Relationship changes that. God Bless Freedom :)

You want raw data, I'LL GIVE YOU RAW DATA!!!

Favorites currently: 24, The Shield, Nip/Tuck, Line of Fire, Chappelle's Show, WWE Raw and Smackdown, SportsCenter, Pardon the Interruption, The Simpsons, Arrested Development, Aqua Teen Hunger Force, Harvey Birdman, Sealab 2021, Home Movies (recently cancelled), Futurama, Family Guy, Fillmore!, and many, many others... let me know if you need more current ones.

All-time Classics: G.I. Joe, Thundercats, Robotech, The A-Team, Knight Rider, Airwolf, Dukes of Hazzard, ST:ToS and TNG, Buck Rogers, Cheers, Seinfeld, The Critic, The Price is Right, Family Feud, Press Your Luck, Miami Vice, The Real World (season 1 and 2 only), Sifl and Olly, Beavis and Butthead, let me know if you need more, cuz I got more...

Countdown to Ireland: 14

Snarky bastard. Northern Exposure was Alaska. It's sunny today. The weather here does not understand progression.

Pub tour sounds great. Ireland has great pub lunches -- fresh meat, potatoes, and vegetables, for about $5. You should go and take the tour at Kilmainham Gaol while you're in Dublin. Great history tour, but also an awesome building. It's the jail where the arrested members of each uprising since British invasion/occupation have been kept, including those from 1916. So in one tour, you get a history of jail architecture (how can you NOT love that?), a history of Ireland's uprisings, and a sense of what prison must have been like. Good stories. Also check out Trinity's campus. There are probably great cheap pubs nearby. We went thorough Shannon, but I don't remember much about it.

Oh, and that's a horrid comment. I plan on traveling both with and without my s.o. (the current one, and ones after, if that happens) for the rest of my life. If he doesn't like to travel, we will have issues. You definitely better find a woman who wants to travel, or you're going to be pissed off and bored and she's going to wonder why you can't sit still. I don't think it's necessarily the Relationship that pins you down. It's kids. Who the hell wants to travel with kids? (Spent a lot of time in airports in the last week....)

I'm working on a new research project and need raw data. What are your favorite television shows? I would much prefer stuff that's on right now, but classics will work. I'm sure I can get a hold of them somewhere. I have a theory I'm trying to prove.

SNOW?!?!?!?

[doubles over in laughter]

That's Northern Exposure for ya.

Yeah, Susan--it's your car, you should name it. K.A.R.R. and I have become pretty close over our five-year relationship, and he's never let me down. If I can think of anything cool, though, I'll let you know.

Oh, I didn't mention I'm going on a Pub Tour in Ireland in 14 days? Man, I thought I told you guys everything that was going on with me :) I figured I need to get these trips in before some female finally pins me down... a friend wanted to go to Spain, but I pushed for Ireland... that whole Madrid bombing helped out a bit, unfortunately. So we're off to Dublin and Galway for a few days to make some new friends over a pint or two or three or thirty-four, who's counting? Last night we watched a PBS special on DVD "Ancient Ireland"... pretty boring stuff, but the included "Over Ireland" was an amazing fly over video showing all the major locales... beautiful, beatiful stuff. I can hardly wait. Wish I was going for a month instead of a few days. More to follow.

Okay, $3. That's my final offer.

QUICK POST

First, IT'S FUCKING SNOWING HERE. WHAT THE FUCK??? IT'S MAY 12.

Second, yes, Susan found the perfect car with the perfect group of wacked out owners. Gertrude and I, however, refuse to participate in naming the Cooper. She will have her own name, and anything you can assign will be like naming a cat, redundant and misleading.

Third, if the Relationship is good, you can ask certain favors of a partner. As in, you are allowed to say "this one habit you have really bugs the shit out of me. Are you willing to modify it a little?" But you can't say "change a basic tenet of your nature." You can't ask a non-communicative person to be communicative. You can ask him to try to open up to you, but that's about it and good luck.

Fourth, I think we've all been where Mark was. If you've put time and effort and emotion, specifically love, into a Relationship, it's hard to just say "hey, this doesn't work. See ya." And there's that line you have to find -- you have to work at a relationship to make it good and make it work, but at what point is it so much work that you're forcing something that doesn't exist? The difference here, however, is that Susan's pouring work into something that MAY exist at some point in the future, not something that is a standing relationship. If a Relationship requires that much effort from the get-go, I have to think that signals a problem.

Fifth: Ireland? More please?

Sixth: Fuck $5. We'll take a camcorder and make millions ourselves off our hot witty conversation. We're hiring the writers from the Gilmore Girls. And I get Luke.

Wow. Looks like we're back in business. Just some quick thoughts:

--I dig the new blogger interface.

--That's a pretty good list, Kate--you can tell a lot about a person by what things they'd put in such a list. You may not be the war-monger I normally like to vote for, but if you ever run for President, you've got my vote. Just promise me you'll blow up some random country, if elected :) Oh yeah, I think the Bellagio in Vegas is simply one of the most beautiful buildings I've ever seen.

--Susan, the beautiful thing about the Internet is that people can obsess over anything at all. Even better, they can get together in groups and go over every detail... sounds like you'll fit in quite well with the Mini owners :) Some of those gift and decor ideas sounded pretty cool. I want the movie rights to you and Kate's road trip, tenatively titled "Thelma and Louise 2004". I'll give you five dollars for 'em.

--Sounds like I missed one hell of a party :)

--I don't know so much about there's NO way you can fudge things with a guy. I admit it ain't bloody likely you're gonna get a guy to change, but you have to remember there are social stigmas at work behind the scenes. They don't call it pussy-whipped for nothing. However, you are right in that certain major things do already have to be there, you can't make them happen, no matter what you do. My last relationship lasted way longer than it probably should have because I refused to give up on it, despite it not really being ideal. I thought I could just deal with it. When it all caught up to me, man, it wasn't pretty.

Countdown to Ireland: 16

whoa, they changed the interface here with blogger. um, ok, guess i can roll with it for now.

anyways, as for the weekend...the party was cool and the food was great. i did get to meet kt's lov-aaaah, greg. i have to say that i liked him. he was smart and funny, but in a very subdued way. he reacted well to my barbs i thought...good thing. hes not my type, although thats a good thing considering im not dating him. hes a cross between a young woodrow wilson and howdy doody...cute but in an oddly out of time/midwestern way. it may have been the glasses combined with the goofy hair. yep, greg is now officially 'woody' to me. lol! overall a good catch i would say...and seemingly mentally stable too without major personality issues unlike previous boyfriends...congrats! i think you've graduated boyfriend school! i think im still going through boyfriend summer school! lol!

and yes, kt met mike. the first thing she said when i asked her about him was that he wasnt my type. she picked up right away that hes not the kind of guy who opens up about and discusses his thoughts and feelings. shes too astute! but shes right. the more conversations i have with mike about things i realize that kts statement was spot on. hes a great guy and cute as all get out but hes missing some critical elements i require. it would be like me buying a new car that came without air conditioning or heat or something. i just gotta have a communicative guy! and the thing im realizing slowly but surely is that when it comes to most situations you can usually fix or work around issues so that you come out a winner...but with guys, you just cant work with the flaws because there is no fudging the situation to be a winner in the end. and its not so much about changing a guy because i know you cant do that, i cant even explain it all really. my philosophy has always been that ill get what i want eventually with some work and monte hall-ing it by hook or crook and that works with almost everything BUT guys! with guys you just cant hang on and fudge the situation to work, you just gotta drop it baby. im learning that, but slowly. but in the end, with me and mike, its all good. our last conversation was really good and i really got insight into his thought process. he is so whipped by his last few g-friend experiences that he just doesnt want ANY of the nonsense. thats a shame because he may be missing out on some woman who is perfect for him, but hes gotta be ready himself. and yeah, when he starts dating people im sure it will be hard for me and vice versa with him when i date, but we'll get over it. i want him to be happy whomever that comes with. but hopefully this has brought us closer in some fucked up way. i told him that i didnt know how he could ever be shy with me again about things considering whats happened and what we've talked about. i think our last conversation got both of us to a new comfort zone and i think we've both moved on from things. he is strictly my cute friend and thats all i want. funny enough, we both agree that its a shame we cant do the fuck buddy thing with each other...oh well, cant change my basic hardwiring or his...

but anyways. i have good news!!! my baby mini cooper, angst, (this is a tentative name only, other suggestions are welcome!) is gonna be built this week sometime. she's expected to be born may 18th (moz's new cd release day!!!). yes, i do expect baby car shower gifts! hehehehe! i should send out baby car notices, that would be hilarious as fuck! shall i post a list of baby car shower wants for your purusal and purchase? hehehehe! if only i could register at auto zone! but i have been reading religiously all the mini cooper posts on different websites and apparently these crazy people have figured out a way to track your mini once its been loaded on a boat to be shipped. once your mini is built it will be assigned a boat to be shipped on and you can go to the shipping company's website and see the status of your mini. you can also go to a couple other websites and get the boat's callsign from the coast guard and actually track the exact latitude and longitude of the ship enroute from england. its very cool the amount of detail you can find about the shipping but its also a little scarry that people went through this amount of work to figure this out in the first place! of course i will be obsessively checking out when my mini is scheduled to leave and on which ship. there are whole posts dedicated to people discussing their ship and who else is on the ship and shit like that. they have all the ship names and their itineraries and everything! i obviously bought the right car bacause its clearly the car for obsessive compulsives! but another cool thing i learned today was that you get gifts from mini in the mail. i recieved my first one today. its the unauthorized mini owner's manual. its got stuff in it like goofy ways to customize your mini and how to fit things in it like golf clubs and other goofy trivia like the fact that the passenger floor area can fit 4 large pizza pie boxes. one thing in there i would LOVE to get is the mini magical motoring ball. its basically a magic 8 ball that has the mini logo on it and has mini related answers in it. if anyone can find one i would love you to death!!! the manual also came with a bunch of stickers you can re-label your toggle switches with. these stickers include such goofiness as "ejector seat," "oil slick," and "self-destruct sequence." those mini guys are so wacky. so anyways, if angst can get built and get on one of the ships leaving soon i should have her by early june...thats if things go well. keepin my fingers crossed!

so, heres the contest for this month- come up with a buunch of mini baby names for me to choose from...whose name will be the winning mini baby name?! hehehehe! be creative! the more goofy british, the better!

Oh, and I'm with Mark. Someday I'd like to go to Vegas. But with the right people. I need someone I can geek architecture with. Strange requirement, I know, but it's my needs. It's all about me baby.

Okay, so I think the weekend went well. I’m sort of in a lack-of-sleep induced coma. Besides staying up and out too late all weekend, I was sleeping with the damn dogs and I think I’m going on a maximum of 5 hours per night. Since I generally need 9 to be happy and healthy (or my version, which boils down to “not cranky”) I’m in zombie land.

So, travel log:
Flew in Thursday, as did my uncle and my mom’s best friend. We went to a new and decent (not great, just passable) steak house for the birthday dinner – Thursday was her actual birthday.

Friday, spent an ungodly amount of money in 1.5 hours at the party store, the plant store, and the grocery store. My mother purchased the booze and the meat (ham and chicken) for her own birthday party, which is unfortunate, but I could afford everything! Unexpectedly, her best friend kicked in some money for the rest, which was really nice. Baked stuff, and then went and picked the S.O. up at the airport. Big family dinner. I have a feeling meeting my family and hearing some of the stories that were told may have been enlightening for him.

Saturday: Made party food, decorated, set up bar, did, as Susan puts it, the whole domesticky Martha Stewart thing. All of this took 99% of the minutes between 9am and 4pm. Partied from 4pm to ??? Don’t remember, really. Hosting a party for 50+ is work, but people seemed to have a good time, and my mother LOVED it, so it was definitely all worthwhile. Afterwards, got to see first hand the downfall of the pussy wagon and visit Susan’s precinct and the not-so-perfect boy. Not so perfect, really. And what the hell is up with the hair blow-drying?

Sunday: Braves game. Baseball is BORING. Turner Field is kind of cool, though, for a place that charges $4 for a bottle of water. Got lost in the ghetto, saw an on-ramp to I-75 blocked off to be used – get this – as a parking lot! Who’da thunk it? Later, there is a FANTASTIC new ice cream place just down the road from ASC, just south (I think south) of Twain’s, called Jake’s. With flavors like “coffee and doughnuts,” “Mexican Hot chocolate,” “Thin Mint,” and “margarita sorbet,” they’ve got a good thing going on. And it’s in an old house with a coffee house-like atmosphere. Good stuff. Old campus doesn’t look as bad as I thought it would with all the newer stuff.

Will think about the Must Do Before I Die list. Susan gave me a book years ago – a birthday present based on my list-making tendencies, which is 1,000 Things to Do before you Die. Maybe I’ll dig that out tonight.

Short List??
1. See Russia
2. See Barcelona
3. Road Trip with Susan (thoughts on this one)
4. Finish Anna Karenina, Atlas Shrugged, and The Marble Faun
5. Visit all counties in North Dakota (about 80% there) and all 50 states
6. Join a protest march that's meaningful to me, preferrably in D.C.
7. Run for some sort of office, even if it's just local
8. Purchase and own a piece of property
9. Skinny dip in a natural lake in the middle of nowhere (working on this)
10. Go to New York City
11. Walk Hadrian's Wall across England (working on this, too)
12. Fulfill a fantasy involving a campfire and stars
13. Publish

Hmmm. That's less short than I'd thought. I could go on, but I should go work.

Okay fine, so we got our butts kicked. Stoopid Philly and their stoopid Flyers. I was actually at the game here in Tampa... I'm no true hockey fan, but I'm getting better. I'd never been to an NHL playoff game before. Before I die, I'd like to go to the championship game of every major sport at least once. So far, I've been to the Arena Bowl (won by Tampa Bay last year). So, in lieu of Susan's love troubles or Kate's political rants, I put this to you guys: What do you think are some of the must-see or must-do things in life before you die? It can be anything, don't limit yourself to the ones I'm putting down. Here are a few of mine:

A) going to Vegas
B) going to championship sports events
C) traveling abroad
D) spending time one-one-one with each of your family members (for instance, I took my mom to Columbus for a weekend and my dad to Vegas for a weekend, still working on my brothers)
E) going to Mardi Gras

Hmmm... sounds like SOMEONE likes to travel :)

Uh... hello... ... this thing on...?

Uh... GO LIGHTNING?

That is all.

yeah i suppose i have been hibernating some and thus the blog has been too. apparently nobody has much to say other than to comment on my personal life! lol! so anyways, ive just been hanging out and surviving...its been rough. i realized the other night during a part-time job of mine that me and mike were wrong to begin with. hes a great guy and sexy as all get out but hes emotionally unavailable. for whatever reason he wouldnt have been there for me the way i want or need. shit, he wasnt even really all that there for me during the months we were just friends so why would i have thought hed been there more if we dated?! i wouldve just gotten pissed off and we wouldve ended up badly. whether things will ever change with him i dont know...im movin on to greener pastures. doesnt mean it aint hard sometimes when he does something that makes me all warm but i just need to break that bad habit. im sure things will get better with time and enough negative reinforcement on my part...perhaps one of those dog shock collars would work?! lol!

so yeah, mikes done and over with for the most part. and im done and over jenn and her bullshit for the most part. im not gonna fight that battle anymore. some people are just not worth all the effort.

and of course work has been bullshit like usual. i got my evaluation done the other day and got short-changed by my new sgt. i spoke with some of the other sgts and they agreed that a few of the categories were scored too low. they are gonna go to bat for me and get them fixed. considering i am in the top 3 in the precinct on productivity i shouldve gotten a higher score than what i did. so ive been running around working on that today. gotta love going to work on your days off.

and of course working out with jeff has been rough lately too. i had a fabulous week the other week but lately its been hell. everything has hurt so much and its all been so hard. he constantly pushes me and thats of course what i pay him for, but some days im just at rock bottom. im at a point in my life right now where i cant give much more. i fight all the time and i just cant fight anymore. im exhausted mentally and physically. so when i go into the gym and he rachets it up about 12 notches and expects me to come out all piss and vinegar and smiling, sometimes i can do that but lately i just cant. so i slog through and he swears im doing well despite it all. i just wish things could be easier, ya know?!

i mean, somewhere in my mind i knew life wouldnt be all brownies and smiles, but damn, its been quite a few rough fucking years...cant i get a pass?! i feel like im on the verge like im about to bust out but its not quite near. ive been working on quite a few life-improvement projects and i guess i just need to wait patiently for just a while longer. im changing my body physically with jeff, changing my appearance by finally growing my hair out for that angelina jolie look (hehehe!), and re-straightening my teeth after they shifted some from not wearing my retainer (you never appreciate things till YOU have to pay for them thats for damn sure!!!). im also buying a new car and finishing paying off my debt from those goddamned credit cards. the plans are chugging along slowly but surely, id just like to see some returns you know?! and damn if i wish work wasnt so much nonsense. i miss the guys i used to work with soooo much and am having a rough time adjusting to the new group of losers who have come in. its like i lost my family. but hopefully i will be moving on to greener pastures in the upcoming months where i can learn something new and take on new challenges where i can really shine. growing up never ends apparently and it never gets easier. i guess i just gotta wait around some more until i bust outta this joint for good!

and damn if im not antsy about my mini cooper. i keep checking the status page at mini to see where my mini is and it just keeps saying "on order." goddamn you brits, make the fucking car already! i hear from other people the website is like a week or more behind so perhaps little angst is already assembled and waiting to be shipped home to momma...one can hope. ive been looking at stuff online and already have plans to upgrade a few parts for higher performance. i also found a place that sells diamondplate floor mats for the mini. for those who dont know what diamondplate is its that sheet metal stuff with the raised little diamonds on it that makes a pattern on the metal that you usually see toolboxes for trucks made out of or see in mechanics type places. it looks pretty fucking cool and its clearly bizarre and out of the ordinary. im gonna wait and get angst before i start buying shit for her, but i am excited as shit...although it does still seem like a dream. until im in the car and driving it i wont believe it. and damn good i ordered her when i did because the pussy wagon is really on her last legs. when you put your foot to the floor on the gas and she doesnt go, thats a problem. poor pussy isnt firing all 6 cylinders anymore! ugh! looks like im not the only one having problems lately!

so yeah, that been about it. got a lot of irons in the fire and am working on getting a couple extra part-time jobs to boost the finances some. if i think im tired now...lol! but hey, gotta make ends meet and if i can pay shit off sooner im gonna do it. its all part of being an adult i guess...sacrifice, sacrifice, sacrifice. so yep, thats the dealie yo. although i cant wait for this weekend where i get to meet kt's lov-aaaaah! should be interesting. hope i can bring my A game! lol! we shall see of course...

I was waiting for someone else to say something... and now that you have...

The Soul of Sex, eh? Sounds interesting. But I'm thinking you're going to have to elaborate quite a bit more on where this guy is going with all this... does he literally mean the sexual/sensual in everyday life, or is it perhaps finding pleasure in the things in everyday life? I suppose I should just read it for myself, but we all know that ain't gonna happen. So paraphrase already... I'm kinda curious to hear another take on the subject.

Grabbing life by the throat is a difficult task indeed, time being your worst enemy. My inner geek and my inner frat boy continue to engage in Mortal Kombat over control of the current day and near future's activities. Stay at home with the 60" and the consoles, or go out and be around other human beings... it's a tougher decision than you might think. Best case scenario, I'd have time to do both, but so far it hasn't been working out that way. The big loser is work, but I am blessed with a job that allows me to devote a minimal amount of effort while still being productive. According to my life's plot clock, I should be due for another serious relationship in 3... 2... 1... soon :)

It simply has to be soon, because I've once again reached that point where I have enough stuff to look forward to and to do on a weekly basis that a serious relationship might possibly be the worst thing that could happen to me right now.

Remember to find happiness in your everyday life, folks... I don't know about finding the sexual/sensual in everyday life (sounds like an interesting idea though), but at least find some bit of happiness. Even if it's just your favorite TV show, your favorite food, the guy you cut off on the road, or simply exacting revenge on the people who have crossed you.

Is the blog hibernating?

I was psychotically busy last week. We had a state review board meeting on Friday (I'm the exec. secretary for them and arrange the meetings) and then a conference at which I had to present on Saturday. It's over now, but I'm gearing up to fly home on Thursday and begin THAT whirlwind.

Cool things: our community college does a spring Arts Quest thing, this year revolving around pottery, and a bunch of us at work made pots, which have been fired. Tonight, we do raku glazing. Cool.

I'm reading a book called The Soul of Sex. The author's argument is that we seek out meaningless sex and other random "pleasures" because we have, as a society, neglected to see the sexual/sensual in our everyday lives and maximize it. He talks of living a sexual life that has little to do with just orgasm (although he's all for that, too). Interesting idea -- to maximize the pleasures in life without harm to one's physical or psychical self. He dissects the characteristics of Aphrodite in myth -- mostly that she is capricious and full of change -- and then speaks of our regimented and comfortable lives, asking if maybe, just maybe, our needs for security and order allow us to ignore the sensual need for new things.

Maybe there aren't mistakes in life so much as things you wouldn't necessarily do again?